Salaah

Salaah

Know what it feels to touch your forehead to the ground and inhale its air?
To stand perpendicularly with thoughts of hope and despair?
Ever felt the palpitation of your heart when His words watered your tongue
And the rush of air entering and exiting deep inside your lungs?

Ever felt so humiliated that it kept you down longer,
Bent and prostrated so much that your legs became stronger
Rebuked and sought refuge from shaytan the accursed
Trying to maintain khushoo’ as if this plea was your first

Ever praised Him, asked from Him, during the depths of the night
While everyone was asleep, you took tiredness to a combat and started the fight
Woke up and untied the knots by performing wudhu
Putting everything else on hold, allowing the nafs to be subdued

And it trembled from within you,
Something grabbed your shoulders and shook you
And ‘Iqra!’ you recited, ‘Iqra!’ you read,
As the voice in your heart quivered and the tears from your eyes bled.

“Rabbana ighfirlee! Ighfirlee!” You put your heart into your hand
It felt painful as you remembered the mistakes and regrets
It killed you to know you’re not as perfect as your arrogance said
The warnings terrified you to the extent it made the hairs on your nape stand
Yet…you stood up and wanted to do it all over again.

Patience

PATIENCE?

Please, you don’t know what patience is

PATIENCE is analyzing the situation
makin that smile last more than a while
resisting the anger that’s burnin inside ya
letting go of the people that no longer desire ya

PATIENCE is speaking many kind words
when everything inside of you is cursing the world
and you got no one beside you but the shadow behind you
and your heart is bleeding but the pain is just silent

PATIENCE is holdin those tears at night as you’re contemplating
when you're tired and imbalanced cuz you cant sleep from the insomnia's agitation
and all those emotions running through you, oh so frustratingggg
you take a step back, breathe twice—hesitation
gather those hands together again and keep supplicating

PATIENCE is wanting that ONE person right there next to you
but that person is farther than far and you don’t know what to do
your heart mind and soul are going crazy from temptations
you know---those crazy feeling to which there are no medications
yet still, just like you, your love is also waiting
so together you stay strong, cuz everything has its explanation

PATIENCE is calling em your friends as they take advantage of your kindness
and they think its ok because they think you’re doing it blindly
as if you’re some naïve little kid who’s desperate for a little attention
but you know sincerity is obviously beyond their comprehension

PATIENCE is holding your tongue when your buttons are getting pushed
you got haters pickin on all sides of you and your head is about to burst
you wanna grab a dagger and end this battle,
but its the patient one who leads the insolent cattle

PATIENCE is walking away from the dark past left behind you
when you’re always reminiscing cuz it keeps following you
but front foot first, you keep your eyes gazing ahead
cuz you can never go back, buddy--the past is dead.

PATIENCE is turning back when you've been pulled to the edge
when you know you could end it all if only you jump off that ledge
you can lighten your shoulders and contemplate suicide over and over again
but you know that no burden will break ur back other than the life after death

PATIENCE is leading the pain away before it begins leading you astray
its taking the time to do right once, so you don’t end up doin what can’t be undone twice
its when you know inside your soul is dying, and everything is keeping you from flying
trapped inside you keep from sighing, so no one knows your troubles are rising
but patience..

PATIENCE is only there to help you
you may hate it, but everything else is out to getchu
the strength of those patient is greater than the trial
so grasp it, unmask it, and hold to it tighter

(2) Type of Girl

I'm the type of girl who will find the foggiest window
and let my mind flow on its surface.

Green Bird

My Mujahid,


I grew up knowing that the ribs protect the lungs and the heart from any exterior destruction that may incur upon them.

But…

My ribs have shattered and I can’t breathe.

How do I describe you other than you’re so amazing.
I love you like no human being could love another.
If you could open my chest and look into it, you’d see my ribs have shattered
And my heart’s beats spell out your name letter by letter, and it weeps, yes...IT WEEPS.
Its tears are made of blood.
But I know now that whatever you did--you did--and now it’s done.

My heart, it can only make two sounds, but its speed says much more.
And if you heard it, you’d know not the words,
But by Allah, you are still alive, and as long as you live, my love for you will never die.

You left this dunyaa with empty pockets,
But you hold the wealth of wounds on your face
And as I envision this blood still inside of you
With these memories, the oceans of my eyes will race
But these are not tears of sadness, for I am blessed more than any woman in the world
My husband died as a martyr and lives in the breasts of the green birds!

I will not lie to you, for Allah is above me
But it is difficult not having you
I am selfish to want you
And each second has elongated,
Because I await the day to be reunited with you.

OH AND HOW WONDERFUL THAT DAY WILL BE!

Sitting with you under the shades of Jannah’s trees
Holding you in my arms once again amongst the beauty of the gold and gems
And I shall speak to you, and I shall sing to you, and I shall caress you
And you smiling right back at me will put this entire world and all that is in it to shame

…because you’d be a piece of jannah, imprisoned in dunyaa, while they’ll be pieces of hell-fire, running their desires free.

When It's Excessive

When It's Excessive

Too busy looking at the opposite gender
To see the path in which you are walking?
Probably if you lowered your gaze a little
You’d see the cliff of shame at the edge of your steps.

Too indulged in your burning anger
To notice the harmful words and actions you display?
Perhaps if you opened your heart a little
You’d clearly see an excuse of the accused one.

Too pampered in a luxurious life
To know how destitute victims live day by day
Maybe if you shared a little
One less person would be suffering.

Too caught up in the gossips of the day
To notice your own imperfections that necessitate purification?
Maybe if you listened twice as much as you talked
You’d have more significant things to say.

Living in an excessive life
And still have complaints?
If you said Alhemdulilah, Inshallah, Subhanallah, Allahu Akbar
Perhaps you’d find yourself richer with an empty pocket.

The riches of this world shall blind you,
And in what a perfect state of recognition you'll be!
For when the doors of your grave open
Darkness, loneliness, and fear, is exactly what you'll see.

The Restless Sinner

The Restless Sinner


Woke up this mornin’
Couldn’t stop thinking of Him
Where is He in my life,
Why didn’t I stop sinnin’

Can’t think straight
Can’t live life right
Everything’s tumbling downwards
Lost my way? Naw, lost my sight.

O Lord will I be forgiven?
Cuz at night I can’t fall asleep
And those people prayin’,
It’s like they know my secret

But I haven’t told anyone
Lord only You know,
But it feels like everyone else
Gots somethin’ to reveal bout me
Gots somethin’ to pin on me
Gots somethin’ to show

I don’t want to be humiliated
With blackness on my face
Shunned away from your shadow
Labeled in hell as a disgrace

I don’t want my lips pinned closed
With my hands answerin’ for me
Cuz if I wasn’t washin em with dirt
They wouldn’t have ended up dirty

What got me here to want death,
Yet to know I can’t live up to it
But a worthless slave I am
Dunno where in this world I’m fittin’ in

Rectangle is the prayer mat
As rectangular as the grave
But if death struck yesterday
All I would’ve taken with me is a guilty conscious
With no deeds saved
Where would’ve been my deathbed
If yesterday would’ve been my last day?
I dunno, I dunno…
But I definitely wouldn’t have died prayin’

I hang my head down
As the son of shame
La illahi il Allah
O Lord I call your name!

My sins are eatin' at me like the worms of death
And already my guilty conscious is drownin' me
Cuz everytime I sink to the bottom, I lose my breath
And as I turn to you O Allah
Its like I’m taking blows of the knife to my chest
Cuz you were always there, always
But with the life blown in me,
I was doin' everything, but passin your test

Repentance I call out!
Let me compensate!
For there’s no soul weaker than mine
Under fitnah’s estate

Ya Rahman, I call to You
Remove this blemish within me
For Your forgiveness I prostrate
Please forgive me as You’ve forgiven those before me.

Shaytan's Sweets

Shaytan’s Sweets



Today, Shaytan opened his store
Without shame, I walked through his door
“Indulge as much as you please,
“There are no limits, not even fees.”
My eyes gazed upon a wrapped sugar cane,
“With just one taste, it depletes all your pains”
Never did I see such colors in one sweet
When I stepped closer to it, I felt the heat.
“Touch it, grab it, and take as much as you please,
In Shaytan’s store, there are no limits, not even fees”

Then there was another voice heard, this time in my own head
But Shaytan’s voice was louder, so on his words I fed
I took the sweet, unwrapped it, and ate
Shaytan began to laugh, laughing at my eternal fate
My stomach began to ache, turning, twirling in pain
Reaching out again, he said, “Here, take another cane!”
I turned my face away, couldn’t stand the aching
“Have another one, they are for the taking,
“If you want to be healed, have three or more!
“Everything here cures, this is Shaytan’s store!”

Before I knew it, the whole sweets box was empty,
Then I tried to walk, breathing with great difficulty
My eyes burned, my stomach turned, my intestines churned
Left alone screaming in the darkness, no other soul heard
When I reached for the doorknob, it melted in my hand
I shrilled from the suffering; this came all with Shaytan’s plan
Then I remembered the voice in my head; if only I listened
Instead, I decided to hear Shaytan’s evil whisperings

I went to recollect my thoughts in a highly warm seat
Then the floor shattered, revealing that hell burned right under my feet
My stomach began to bleed and ooze
My outer skin boiled, my kidneys separated in twos
Then my eyes became dry, burning vainly
Even crying—whimpering was done painfully
My stomach was pried open with two scorching tools
Revealed inside was what I indulged in, what I consumed.
All that came out was a puff of smoke named Dunyaa
Dunyaa said “You indulged in me, now Shaytan controls you’
“You wanted to devour carelessly, so now the fire consumes you”

My head began to shake; the insides of my body quaked
Limbs were being ripped off, replaced, re-burned, baked

Finally, for a moment, it all stopped.
No, it was just the numbing effect of my limbs getting chopped.
No, it was the silence of my tongue getting cropped
No, it was just me in a worried state
Wondering if this abode is my eternal fate.
No, it was just the senselessness of another’s body getting swapped
My heart shook with its own mind; there was no time to be brave
When I thought this was my eternal abode, I was wrong…this was just one minute locked in the grave.